[FiXx] Accept Only the Finest in Scripting! [FiXx] AutoSignature - the real thing, not like a mimic! [ F i X x ] Revolutionizing VBBS Scripting! [ F i X x ] NET - Join today for the latest in scripts! [ F i X x ] Email 1@1205017 VirtualNET for more information! [ F i X x ] Email 1@1205017 VirtualNET to be on the mailing list! [FiXx] Technical Support at 1@1615004 or 1@1205017 VirtualNET! FILES=1 BUFFERS=0 FCBS=SAYWHAT BREAK=GIMME Insert diskette in Drive C. Press [ENTER] to continue... let length(Long_Walk) > length(Short_Pier) ONLINE? Hit for a quick I.Q. Test! Press any key to continue, or any other key to quit. printf("to C or not to C...that is the question/n"); REAL Programmers Don't Write Games. REAL programmers write self-modifying code. It's only a hobby... only a hobby... only... My reality check just bounced. Honey, what does 'Formatting Drive C:' mean? So why did they go from PS/2 to PS/1??? I'm not super man. But I am very dense. Backup my hard drive?! I can't find the reverse switch! I call things as I see them. If I don't see them I make it up! Mr. Worf fire phasers at will! *ZAP* Hey where did Riker go? What!?! This isn't the FILES section! The Energizer Bunny was arrested! He was charged with BATTERY... Windows- The fastest way to turn your 486 into a XT. I wonder what this button does? *&^(&^)#@$*&_% NO CARRIER I hit the CTRL key but I'm still not in control! Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this floppy? [<<] [>] [>>] [] [||] [|>] hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? howmanycharactersdoyouthinkyoucanfitintoonetaglineanyway? if(ThisDay()!=MyDay)DosSleep(ulTillNextDay); shift key/ never heard of it1111 while(math_teacher() == talk) fall_asleep(); ޺۳ݳݳ <- Will "Hooked on Phonics" teach this? h  mM gs Where we operate at is a 90 angle to reality. Are you a Klingon, or is that a turtle on your head? Beam me aboard, Scotty! How about A 2x4, sir?? Modem, said the gardener when he'd finished the lawn. Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore... #define flame_retardant I know you are, but what am I? (((((This message in Stereo where available))))) (A)bort, (F)ail, (T)oss computer across room (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)ue (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ail, (G)rab_Hammer (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (K)ick system (A)bort, (R)etry, (P)anic (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)ell it A RAM is a terrible thing to waste. Thou shall not kill, unless it's for dinner! ...only a test. Had this been an actual tagline... << Politically Un-Corrct Tagline Deleted! >> to read the next message A Penny earned is a Penny owed (Probably to Uncle Sam) A poor excuse is better than no excuse! ASCII stupid question...get a stupid ANSI. As easy as 1, 2, 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841 BBS 'till you drop - carrier Backup is for whimps! Beam me up Scotty. This isn't the men's room. Become a programmer and never see the world!!! Bush/Quayle ERROR: Division by zero. But I thought YOU did the backups... Buy a IBM. It can do SOMETHING right. C Programmers do it with models! C U L8TR C code. C code run. Run, code, run.... PLEASE! C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit. CGA is the pallete from hell CONNECT 110?!? Help! I'm in s l o w m o t i o n !! Can't wait for them 100Gb, 10ns drives! Closed Captioned in HEX for Programmers. Command Not Understood. . . Now erasing Hard Drive Compiling...Linking...Dialing Copyright Lawyer... Complaints? Write them here legibly [] <- Daddy! Let me push a(*$#!@# NO CARRIER No! Don't pick on the pho^$ L%#! Do HD's sneeze when they catch a virus? Docs....I don't need no stinkin' docs! Don't Touch That Phone...I'm On The Mode^%$#(*@(* NO CARRIER Don't worry, I'm gong t bckup td!&%#~% Drive A: not responding.. .Formating C: instead Error finding REALITY.SYS - Universe halted. Everyone is entitled to my opinion, just ask me... Feel good? Don't worry; you'll get over it! File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N) For Sale: Dehydrated HO - $14 per quart Go ahead...MAKE MY DOWNLOAD!!! Elvis isn't dead, he's just shelled to DOS. H y! Wh r did my " " k y go? HELP! My hard drive crashed & I can't boot up He who dies with the most software WINS! He who dies with the most hardware WINS! Hey, whats that beeping noise? Wheres that smoke coming from? I wish I could remember where I parked my hard disk.... I despise WINDOWS! I won't use Windows, I won't use Windows, I won't.... ILLITERATE? Write for a free brochure... If it wasn't for C, we'd be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL In Borland you are never bored! In an atomic war, all men will be cremated equal. Include this in your CONFIG.SYS File: BUGS=OFF Install failed. Attempting to transfer virus to c: Is HST faster than the Concord? It said "Insert disk #3", but only 2 will fit! It's not a BUG, it's an undocumented feature! Ithinkmyspacebarstoppedworking. Itsdifficulttobeverycreativewithonlyfiftysevencharacters! Keyboard is unattached. Press F10 to continue Keyboard locked..Press F1 to continue Long live the C64! G-g-guys? I was only kiddin, Make way!, Make way!, A PROGRAMMER HAS ARRIVED!! Mary had a little RAM -- only about a MEG or so. Most political jokes get elected. My last original thought died of loneliness. I'm not a computer nerd; merely a Computer Jock. OS/2: What Windows will NEVER BE! Programmers don't repeat themselves, they LOOP Reality.Sys corrupted -- Reboot Universe (Y/N)? Reformat Hard Drive! Are you SURE (Y/Y)? Scotty! Hurry! Beam me uragg^*)(@$ NO CARRIER This is an egg. This is a frying pan. Any questions? This is your sysop. ôs s ou ssop ug. To Ski or Not to Ski THAT is the Question! WARNING: Programmer X-ing WHAT??? Give up C:\> for silly ICONS? WHeRe is ThaT DArN ShIfT keY? WINDOWS SUCKS!! Windows: From the people who brought you the 640K limit. Windows? HA! C:\WINDOWS. DELETE *.* AH! Thats Better `NO GUTS NO GLORY' `NO FEAR' I program, therefore I am. I'm a programmer, I don't do COBOL. My computer can beat up your computer. Never play leapfrog with a unicorn. Don't vote. It incourages them! I may be fat, but you're ugly-and I can lose weight! Old Skiers never die. They just go downhill. Black holes suck! [ F i X x ] ' 9 5